Jokes That Didn't Make it to Stage (Part 3)

Here is are a new list of jokes that were funny but not funny enough to make it to stage.

Is it me or do the automatic paper towel dispensers sound like robot screams?

When you wash your hands do you ever worry that same one is going to walk in and think that you've just planned to take over the world.

I over react in traffic when people cut me off. I'm like "OH smooth, real smooth! let me see this jerk! He better pray for no red lights because i will beat... oh crap he's black, don't make eye contact."

The Beginning of Hobo

This is the Beginning of the House Boating Video for Surge. I really like it.



its 7 in the morning and i cant think of anything witty to say

Surge Nights

This is video we will be showing at surge come late august. Since you know about my blog you get to see it first.

The Muse

Hearts feels like it melts, dripping away,
The Sky, the air, nothing seems to be in focus.
Haunted by blissful memories of the past,
Wishing for what I know I can never have.
Eyes piercing, actually seeing inside,
You were the only one I was absolutely real with,
Quicksand of uncertainty cements my stance.
Dreams tease me,
The Muse fuels me for what I want.

Bleh!

Some Jokes That Never Made It to Stage (Part 2)

Here are some more Jokes that never made it to stage -

Movies have warped my reality. Every time there is a room with animals in it i try to do the surprise run-ins to catch them talking.

This should come to no surprise but i have 2 cats and they always hang out together. Now i'm not the jealous type but im going to spread rumors about each other so they come to me...

Do you ever get the feeling that your family thinks you're gay. for Christmas they bought me high heels "dad do you even know what gay is? "sure do, its red headed and sitting right infront of me"

Get Links

Comedy is interesting. The big guys are good because how else would they have gotten to be so big, but by the time they (example, Daniel Tosh, Jeff Dunham, Dane Cook, Jim Gaffigan)are seen they already have writers and are moving on to more comedy specials. Below are a list of great comedians who perform some of the best stage material I have ever heard.

Here are a few links to some great comedians;
Lee Levine - www.leelevine.com
Lord Carrett - www.lordorlaughs.com
Kenny Kane - www.kennykane.com
Darren Carter - www.darrencarter.com
James P. Connolly - www.jamespconnolly.tv
Dan Licoppe - www.danlicoppe.com
Claude Stuart - www.claudestuart.com

Here are some great comedy clubs:
The Comedy Spot (AZ) - www.thecomedyspot.com
The Spotlight Comedy Club (CA) - www.spotlightcomedyclub.com
The Ice House (CA) - www.icehousecomedy.com


Go Support Live Comedy, it's 10 times funnier in person. Trust Me.